Surprise!

“Mom, what are you doing?” Dobby asks.

“Checking my coffee.” Writer Lady looks up at the cat standing on the table with the computer. “For stray grounds.”

“You're drinking that coffee? I thought it was full of grounds.”

“I poured it through another filter, very carefully.”

Dobby sniffs at the cup. “It doesn't smell very good.”

“I think all of the grounds got caught in the filter when I poured it. Besides,” Writer Lady takes a sip, “I've had worse. It's not like it's molded or anything.”

“I think in 2014 we should work on raising your standards a little bit Mom.”

“Why? It's not like I've gotten sick or anything.”

“Mom people die from food poisoning. Don't forget. I'm really important. I don't like anyone else enough to let them feed me.” Dobby says.

“You're right kitty. I shouldn't be so selfish. Pie?” Writer Lady asks.

Dobby sniffs at the plate. “What kind?”

“Lemon Meringue.”

“Mom, that lemon pie is greenish purple. It's growing tentacles.”

“Maybe we shouldn't eat this then. I'll put it in the trash.” Writer Lady takes the pie into the kitchen to throw it away.

“Mom? Put some bug spray on it too. Just in case.” Dobby muttering. “I better not find that thing crawling around the house later tonight.”

“Psst...”

Dobby ignores the sound and heads over to the blanket chest for a nap.

“PSSSST! Dobby!”

Looking up, Dobby sees that it is Tinkletoes standing hidden in the darkened hallway. TP is fluttering back and forth alternating hovering over Tinkletoes' right shoulder and then his left. Tinkletoes gestures for Dobby to come into the hall. Taking one last look at Writer Lady who is looking at kitten pictures on FB instead of writing, Dobby silently jumps off the blanket chest and heads into the hallway.

“What's she doing in there?” Tinkletoes asks.

“Pretending to write.” Dobby answers.

“You have to make her stop. We can't surprise her like this. We need that room.”

“I know. I was waiting for you to be ready. If I sent her away too soon Mom might come back early.”

Tinkletoes looks at TP. TP looks into the living room over Tinkletoes' shoulder. Furnatche, Aunt Purdy, Peter, Paige and Dylan all look back at TP expectantly. TP looks back at Tinkletoes and nods. Tinkletoes turns back to Dobby. “We're ready. Now get her out of here.”

“Okay.” Dobby turns around, does a full body stretch, touches up the fur on the top of his head then heads back into the computer room.

“Mom. Did you get Grandma's message?”

Not turning away from the kitten pictures, “No what message?”

“Grandpa fell down, he's drooling and can't eat his cake. She needs you to come over and eat it for him.”

Writer Lady turns to face Dobby. “Whaaa?”

“I'm not kidding Mom. Call and check.”

Writer Lady picks up her phone to call. “Wait,” she says, “there's a text.” Your father has fallen he is drooling so much he can't eat cake. Come eat cake. Or whatever Dobby said. “That's weird. I better go check on her and Dad. I never should have let her and TP start texting each other. I knew that was going to bite me in the butt sooner or later. I would have preferred later. Much later.”

Writer Lady leaves. Mission accomplished.

Several Hours Later...

“It is so late. I don't know how I'm ever going to get this week's post written.” Writer Lady says hurrying through the house, turning on lights, closing blinds and generally fussing.

“Grandpa is fine. I have no idea what she was talking about. She has no idea what that text was about. Do you know she doesn't even remember sending it?”

Writer Lady looks at Dobby, starting to ask a question when she sees the computer room light is on. “Did I leave a light on kitty? I don't remember doing that.” Mom heads for the room, pauses, grabs the Big Red Flashlight and brandishes it like the weapon few people realize it can be. She approaches the computer room's door. Reaching out, she turns the knob and gives it a push.

“SURPRISE!” Everyone yells. Tinkletoes jumps out from behind the door with TP riding on his nose. The faerie is wearing a clown suit.

In a matter of seconds Tinkletoes had been hit across the nose, smacked on the forehead and taken a hard hit to the groin. The mercenary lands on his knees pale and groaning in pain.

“Oh no, I did it again.” Writer Lady leans down and asks Tinkletoes, “Are you hurt?”

Tinkletoes groans.

“I'm so sorry.”

More groaning.

“Someone please get some ice.” Writer Lady says. A bright red wheelbarrow appears full of ice packs. The wheelbarrow lifts up and empties itself right in front of Tinkletoes. Tinkletoes reaches for the ice packs, positions most of them between his legs and Tinkletoes squats down into the ice. As his color returns he hands ice packs to Peter and Aunt Purdy who ice his forehead and nose for him.

“Oh no! TP! I've hurt TP.” Writer Lady yells in despair.

Tinkletoes looks up at Writer Lady, glares at her for a minute and rolls his eyes.

“Don't worry Writer Lady. I caught him before he hit the wall.” Paige approaches carrying the faerie in her palm.  TP's breathing is labored, his cone shaped clown hat is dangling from one ear.  The faerie is muttering strange words in between breaths but seems no worse for the wear.

“Oh you poor little thing. I'm so sorry.”

Tinkletoes rolls his eyes again.

“Do you need anything TP?”

TP looks down at Tinkletoes. Tinkletoes looks at TP and growls.

TP grins widely at Tinkletoes...

Guess What?

“OW!” Mom yells.

“You can relax Mom the feline mind meld is over.” Dobby says.

“Why didn't you tell me how much it was going to hurt?”

“If you had relaxed like I told you it wouldn't have hurt?” Dobby responds.

“So if your body is relaxed, you don't hurt nearly as much when a Brahma bull comes charging through your cerebral cortex?”

“I don't recall it happening that way.” Dobby says.

“And John Wilkes Booth thought Lincoln had challenged him to a dual. I'm lucky I can talk.” Mom lifts her hands to touch her ears. “My ears feel funny. Tingly.” She feels something odd. “What the hell did you do to my ears?”

“A feline mind meld can only take place if you ears are pointy too Mom. (See The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part 1) They should go back to the right shape soon.”

“I have pointy ears? Oh no! Are they bigger too?”

“No bigger than mine.” Dobby answers.

“Oh no! Not that! I wasn't that pretty to begin with.” Mom jumps up kinda slowly and hobbles to the mirror. Looking down. “I'm wet! Why are my clothes wet? How long did this take?”

Dobby takes his time answering. “About three days. Feline mind melds are in real time. You were unconscious, your body's systems kept functioning normally.”

“You let me wet myself?!” Mom exclaims, returning to the den.

“Your body stopped after it expelled the water you had taken in. So only for the first 18 hours or so.”

“How could you let me sit in my own urine like that?”

“I'm a cat! I don't have thumbs Mom. By the way, it has been three days, it would be so nice if you brushed your teeth right now.”

“No one stopped by?” Mom asks facing Dobby.

Dobby gags a little, turning his head away. “No. Tinkletoes had lots to do after spending all of that time with me while you were gone.”

Mom glares and heads to the bathroom for a toothbrush. Brushing her teeth, muttering.

“What Mom?”

“Okay fine,” between brushing intervals. “Couldn't you have stopped for bathroom breaks, teeth brushing.” Mom sniffs at herself and makes a face. “Showers?”

“I would have under normal circumstances...” Dobby answers.

Mom opens the shower door and turns on the water. She starts undressing. “I'm never going to get these clothes clean enough. I'll always remember. What was so abnormal about this mind meld?” Mom asks then climbs into her shower.

“Well, Mom...um...you're kind of...dense. And um.”

“And? There's an 'and'?”

“You have a really thick skull too.”

“A thick skull is a good thing, especially in an accident.” Mom says cheerfully.

“You never should have done that kitty. Writer Lady did not return with all of her marbles in her mental pouch.” TP whispers in Dobby's ear.

The feline slaps at the faerie and it disappears in a puff of smoke.

“A thick skull is a little tougher to work with. Once I got in your mind I had to stay until the show was over. Sorry Mom.”

Mom turns off the water and gets out of the shower. “I don't like it when you do those things. You were inside my mind.” Mom says as she dries off. “What if you jiggled something loose and didn't put it back?” Mom comes out from under the towel to look in the mirror. “My ears are almost back to normal already. Hot Dog!” She put her head under the towel and dries her hair. “My hair isn't going to fall out or something is it?”

“No it shouldn't.”

Mom's muffled voice says, “Well that's a relief.” Mom grabs her ultra comfortable bath robe, flipping it upside down she puts her legs through the sleeves of the robe. “I feel pretty normal. No harm no foul. It's all good.” Closing the robe, she ties the belt. The fabric falls away from her body. Mom looks down at Dobby. “Boy, three days without eating sure takes off the weight. I wonder what I want to eat first.” Mom heads out of the bathroom and to the kitchen. “This robe sure is hard to walk in. Did you play a trick on me Dobby! Kitty?”

A loud thump is heard in the kitchen.

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part XIII.2

The queen nods to her Master of Ceremonies as she leaves the stage. He plays a favorite song the crowd loves dancing to. It's a good way to keep the attention away from the fact that the queen is missing and Writer Lady is on the main stage, dancing...badly. Writer Lady tries to pretend no one is looking until Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes runs up to the stage holding his phone up.

“Smile.” He teases.

Writer Lady grimaces and gives him the bird.

“Nice. This is going all over the Internet.” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes walks away laughing.

“Relax. You're doing fine. No one is looking at you.”

Writer Lady turns around to see find the Master of Ceremonies dancing next to her. “Thanks.” Writer Lady continues dancing, attempts to pull out some fancy moves, nearly falls off the stage, goes back to the simple stuff.

The song ends and the Queen returns, “The Gem of the Con can see you now.”

“That was fast.”

“I told her what she wanted to hear, Tinkletoes is not in attendance.”

“She was happy?” Writer Lady asks.

“Positively glowing.”

After receiving directions to the Gem's private quarters, Writer Lady thanks the Queen for her time, thanks the Master of Ceremonies for the dance and heads off the stage and into a dressing room door. She took a deep breath holding back her amazement. The room was simply stunning. The Gem's magic made the room much larger than mortal parameters. A fireplace stood opposite to Writer Lady and the door she entered through. There was a beautiful wooden table in front of the fireplace with large comfortable looking chairs. She saw cases full of books. Soft fabrics on the furniture, covering windows and on the window seat to the far right of the room. The room was lit by the fireplace with its blazing fire which appeared not to be giving off any heat, the chandelier above the table and various candles lit throughout the room. For all of it's beauty and opulence, there was no one in it.

“I guess if you have to wait for someone, there are worse places than this.” Writer Lady slowly walks the perimeter of the room starting from the far left (closest to the door) and working her way back towards the bookshelves.

“Those are all first editions. Signed. Signatures can be so important, don't you think?” The Gem's voice comes from the darkened far right of the room. A soft light glows from the cushion of the window seat, growing slowly in size, intensity and shape. “Wine?” The Gem of the Con asks as she rises from her resting place and crosses the room to greet Writer Lady who quietly shakes her head. The Gem is wearing a strapless, satin gown that makes her eyes glow in an otherworldly manner. “Come. Sit with me.”

Writer Lady sits down in the luxuriously overstuffed chair opposite the Gem, her whole body sighing with gratitude.

“This journey has been quite a challenge for you.” The Gem observes.

“Yes it has.”

Closing her eyes for a few brief seconds and then opening them the Gem says, “I see you have been learning patience. That you have had to put yourself up front and center for the greater good. Regardless of personal discomfort.”

“I'm not sure I'm much better at it.” Writer Lady answers with a nervous laugh.

“What you have learned through this journey will make you better at it the next time your patience is tested and coming forward needs to be called upon.”

“The next time?” Writer Lady asks.

“Yes, Writer Lady. Although the outcome of the quest will ultimately benefit Dobby, the challenges were all yours.”

“Shouldn't Dobby have had to jump through all of these hoops then?”

“Ideally yes. But being a cat he is limited. The two of you are so close you were his...”

“Slave, mule, the one who takes the punishment?” Writer Lady asks.

“Catalyst. You kept his journey moving forward. Several people are working together to make his destiny come to fruition because of what you are doing. You make him possible just like any mother would.”

“Thank you.”

“When your husband died the family unit that existed disappeared. You and Dobby are your own family. But like any mother, you wonder about the day he will not be with you. Will you have built a life that is full enough to go on without him?”

A sadness comes into Writer Lady's eyes. “Yes.”

“That is why patience and putting yourself up front outside of your comfort zone has been so important. You can continue building a life with Dobby and without him if your paths cease to travel together later on. I will send you home with what you came for. An autograph. Recognition for Dobby as a V.I.F. (Very Important Feline)." The Gem produces a picture printed on cardstock and a pen.  She carefully signs the picture handing it over to Writer Lady.

"I have something for you as well Writer Lady. Not an object but just bit of information that will help you continue on your way. Going through life alone is not something you wanted, something you hoped never would happen. It did. You are doing well. Relax and let yourself enjoy this journey. Be happy, relish it. Someday soon another will join you on the path you travel. You will be happy then too. Happiness is your destiny Writer Lady. Happiness and some good stories. Keep writing. You have lots to write about.”

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part XIII

“Okay we're in. Go talk to the Queen. Let's finish this already.” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes yells to Writer Lady over the music.

“It's not that simple. She is a Queen after all.” Writer Lady says gesturing to the stage.

“It's not that hard either. This is not exactly a formal setting.” Warrior counters. “See!” he says gesturing to the stage where a large man dressed like Hagrid approached the Queen, danced with her long enough to have a brief conversation and left the stage. She did not call for guards, he was not shot with a laser gun, did not dissolve into the atmosphere while onlookers laughed viciously.

“That was probably a guard or something checking in.” Writer Lady said just as Hagrid walks by looking very intimidating to Writer Lady.

Warrior with Intense Blue Eyes reaches out to the man. “Hey man. How's it going?”

“Good.” Hagrid answers with hesitation.

“My aunt and I were having a disagreement and I wondered if you could help.”

Hagrid nods.

“You were just up on stage with the Queen. Are you one of her guards or something?”

“No. This is my first time at court. Tonight is a celebration. Completely informal. Anyone here is welcome to approach, introduce themselves and ask something of the Queen. As long as she is dancing.”

“My aunt needs to ask something of the Queen but she's shy. Will you take her up there?”

“I'm not sure that's a good idea.” Writer Lady says.

“I can't. It's against the rules. If I go up on stage once I've asked for something I won't have my request granted. It's a really important one. The other rule is you have to approach the Queen on your own.” Hagrid looks at Writer Lady. “Best of luck to you ma'am.”

“Thanks anyway man.” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes says, Hagrid takes his leave, finding a seat along the perimeter of the room.

“Maybe if we all three go up there together?” Writer Lady asks.

“Merlin assigned this journey to you my sister. We should respect the rules of the court. You must approach the Queen on your own.”

“I've never met a Queen before.” Writer Lady says.

“Why don't you dance for a couple songs first?”

Writer Lady gives her sister a sideways glance. “I haven't danced in years. It might be fun.”

“We're going to find some seats. You go dance.” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair suggests.

Making her way closer to the dance floor and the stage, Writer Lady stands on the fringes of the crowd and starts dancing. Feeling awkward she looks around her. No one seems to be looking at her very closely. Something is still strange, is it just because she hasn't been out in so long, or is something else going on?

“Writer Lady's shaking all kinds of stuff. Hee hee hee.” TP's giggles can be heard inside her head.

“Shh! Stop that! Someone is going to hear you.” Writer Lady warns TP with her thoughts.

“Your face is getting red. There are men watching you shake your butt.” TP giggles more.

“That's it! I'm done dancing.” Writer Lady looks at the stage and sees someone has just left the Queen's company. Writer Lady charges up to the stage, stomping all the way up the stairs. The music is loud enough the other dancers do not sense her anger. By the time she reaches the Queen much of her anger had been replaced with fear. Writer Lady stands uneasily in front of the Queen of the Amazing 'Fro.

“Hello.” The Queen greets Writer Lady while continuing to dance.

“Good evening your highness.” Writer Lady returns the greeting and curtsies. The Queen reaches for her and stops Writer Lady halfway.

“This is the ball. The first rule is no rules, which means no formalities. This must be your first time at the ball with my Colorful Court.”

“Yes um...”

“Tonight is a night of fun. You may call me Q.” The Queen keeps dancing. “You?”

“I am Writer Lady, um Dobby's mom.”

The Queen looks at her waiting for better information.

“I met with the Lord and the Lady of the Drawn Story earlier? I'm Tinkletoes' um...friend.”

“Oh him.” The Queen says.

Writer Lady detects some tension and suspects this will no longer turn out well. “TP the faerie told Tinkletoes Merlin was sending me here on a quest and he couldn't come,” explanations come tumbling out. Writer Lady tries to get it all out as fast as she can before she can be thrown out completely.

“Tinkletoes couldn't come or TP?”

“Tinkletoes.”

“I see.” The Queen smiles bigger and dances more furiously than ever.

Writer Lady suspects the Queen is doing her own happy dance. Just a bit more quietly.

“What brings you to my court Writer Lady?”

“Merlin. He sent me on a quest to help fulfill Dobby's destiny. I was hoping you could get me an audience with the Gem of the Con.”

“That's a tall order for your first visit to court.” The Queen comments.

“You know what they say, 'Go big or go home.'” The Queen looks at her suspecting there is another reason. “Merlin told me to and he's incredibly powerful. I don't want to piss him off? It's also for my cat Dobby. He will be impossible to live with if I don't do this for him.”

“Like I said, it's a tall order. The Gem has been stressed lately. She is not her shiny self. I think I know just the right words to get you in. Here.” The Queen says grasping her by the arms and pulling Writer Lady into her spot on stage. “Take my place while I'm gone.”

“What?”

“Dance!” 

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part XII

“What time is it?” Writer Lady asks the Warrior with Intense Blue Eyes.

“Thirty seconds later than when you asked the last time.”

“This is supposed to be the short line. What's taking so long?” Writer Lady asks.

“This isn't the short line. This is the line of people waiting for an audience with the Queen.” The Lady with the Long Golden Hair answers. “Don't worry, my sister, we will see you inside soon enough.”

“Do you remember back in the hotel room when I mentioned how tiny this dress was?” Writer Lady asks the Lady with the Long Golden Hair.

The Lady nods.

“Well now not only am I in a tiny dress but now I'm standing out on the sidewalk after dark.”

“Remember to act like a lady and you will always been seen as one.”

“How can I act like a lady when I feel so...naked?”

“All will be well, my sister, patience.”

“Why is it everyone keeps saying that? You try standing on a dark corner in a tiny dress and see how patient you feel. If anyone asks me 'how much?' I'm out of here.”

A man with a large camera approaches “An audience with the Queen, who awaits an audience with the Queen?”

The Warrior with Intense Blue Eyes whistles to the man with the camera and points at Writer Lady, saying, “She is.”

Writer Lady hears her sister and nephew take an audible step back from her side.

“May I take a picture of you?” the man with the camera asks.

Writer Lady stiffens for a moment.

“You must be photographed in order to speak with the Queen.” TP's voice rings in Writer Lady's head.

“Back huh?” She returns a telepathic message to the faerie thousands of miles away.

“Take the picture, silly.” TP giggles.

“Okay.” Writer Lady braces herself and waits for the picture to be taken. A big flash goes off and it is done. If that is the worst that happens tonight I'll be a happy woman.

“Now what happens?”

“Now you go inside with everyone else.” the man with the camera says and continues down the line calling, “An audience with the Queen, who awaits an audience with the Queen?”

Writer Lady finds The Lady With The Long Golden Hair and the Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes waiting at the door a few feet away. People had started going in and the area had opened up. Working their way through the building and into the Queen's main ballroom Writer Lady felt much better. The room was dark except for lights near the exits and a few stray beams illuminating the space to the beat of the music. The dance floor was overflowing. There were just a few stray handfuls of onlookers spread around the perimeter of the ballroom. It was a ball, clearly people were there to dance. Energy and light radiated from the center of the room. From all those dancers. The entire court was in costume. Many of the costumes were made of brightly colored fabrics that reflected the light from around the room. Some wore helmets with working lights.  Many of the ladies had accessorized with glow jewelry and battery operated twinkle lights. A most bright and colorful court. There in the center of the ballroom, instead of a staircase leading up to a throne, stood a catwalk.  Next to the Master of Ceremonies, who kept the music pumpin', danced the Queen of the Amazing 'Fro.

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part XI

                          

 Or  Aren't We Done Yet?

 

“Come on! Let's go!” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes yells. “If this were a battle you two would be dead already.”

“Patience my son.” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair calls from the bathroom, “She's almost ready.”

“I don't understand why this has to take so long, she lost half her body weight in leg hair.”

The Lady With The Long Golden Hair comes out of the bathroom and meets her son in the center of the hotel room. “She doesn't like having to do this. Please be nice.” She reminds him.

“Can't we just hurry this up already?” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes asks.

“It will be over soon my son.”

“No laughing.” Writer Lady calls from the bathroom. “If there's laughing I'll have Merlin put you in this thing. I'm sure we'll still get lots of attention.”

“Did she get all the hair off of her legs?” Warrior With The Intense Blue Eyes asks.

“Yes. Did you get all of that hair out of the weed whacker?” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair asks.

“I could have but the motor is shot now. It would have been a waste of time.” he answers.

“I really don't like this. Isn't there some other way?” Writer Lady calls, still hiding in the bathroom.

“No. I checked with the Master of Inks. Going to this ball and petitioning the Queen of the Amazing 'Fro for a meeting with The Gem of the Con is your only chance to fulfill Merlin's request. It's time to come out of the bathroom sister.”

“Okay. Here I come.” Writer Lady says. Coming out of the bathroom Writer Lady walks over to The Lady With The Long Golden Hair wearing a short British Flag dress complete with “cheeky” panties, she alternates pulling down on the front of the skirt and the back of the skirt with each step; tripping over her own feet as she walks.

“You look very nice.” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair says. “Doesn't she look nice, my son?” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair asks elbowing the Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes in his stomach.

“Yes. You look nice. You know if you bowed your legs just a little bit more, you would look really great. Like a lady.” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes says.

“Stand up straight.” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair reminds Writer Lady.

Writer Lady complies. “So where's the rest of the outfit?” she asks.

“Walk with confidence and smile, like a lady and you will always be seen as one.” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair answers.

“There is no more is there?” Writer Lady asks, Warrior With Intense Blue eyes shakes his head grinning and holding back laughter.

“I don't like this. I don't like this at all. I've seen hookers with more clothes on.”

“This is why it is called coming out of your comfort zone.” The Lady With The Long Golden Hair reminds her. “It's time to go.”

“Maybe you could use your super flirty powers of persuasion to make some money for coffee in the morning. Even better you could flirt with the concierge on the way out at put us at the top of the room service list for tomorrow morning.” Warrior With Intense Blue Eyes says teasing her as the group shuffles out of their hotel room.

“No, I think he'd like it better if you flashed those baby blues of yours at him. He has been checking out your butt all weekend.” Writer Lady says, laughing.

“Has not.”

“Has too.” Writer Lady responds laughing even more. She closes the door behind her giving one last tug to the back of her skirt while no one is looking.