Saturday, October 23, 2021

When A Self-Proclaimed Mercenary And A Writer Lady Butt Heads

 

Dylan pokes his head into the room. His older sister Paige’s head, appears just above his. “Ray wants to know if there are cookies.” He says.

Writer Lady situates herself so she can peer around Tinkletoes’ side. “We are out of cookies.”

“Is there anything else to snack on?” The six year old asks. “We’re hungry.”

“We are out of snack crackers, chips, and pretzels.” Writer Lady responds, as she runs through a mental list. “Chocolate and soda too.”

“There’s no food.” Dylan announces. He raises his eyes to his sister. “We’re gonna starve.”

“We’re out of junk food you big baby.” Paige responds to her brother. “There’s plenty of food in the house. Eat an apple.”

Tinkletoes turns to face the children. “Writer Lady is being naughty. Go eat your apples. I’m gonna see to it that she behaves.”

TP pops in, floating in front of Tinkletoes. “Don’t look down. You’re gonna get it now.” The faerie giggles.

Tinkletoes looks down. Writer Lady’s face is red, her eyes have deepened in color to a black shade of blue. Several moments pass and slowly… the redness dissipates and her eyes return to their natural bright cornflower blue. “Don’t be silly TP, I’m a grown woman. I would never resort to violence.” She looks at Tinkletoes then turns her attention to the open doorway, Writer Lady calls, “Dylan, tell Ray there’s a container of Creme De Menthe cupcakes in the refrigerator for everyone to snack on.”

“Those are my cupcakes.”

Writer Lady looks at Tinkletoes. “They were. Now if you’ll excuse me.” She says turning back to the computer.

“No.” Tinkletoes responds.

“No?”

“You’ve already gotten away with taking off on adventures with a pirate and brief dalliances with actor guys.”

“As you know, Pirate and I were saving the world from a full scale invasion of magical beings not to mention protecting my sister. I kissed Monitor Man, one time, Carp told me to.”

“Here you are again, writing yourself into a story so you can play patty cakes with some weirdo named Nathan.”

“Nathan huh?” Carp comments as he enters High command. “A gift from God. Tell me Writer Lady how are his pecs?”

Writer Lady turns to Carp, she points to the screen in front of her, “He’s a character in a story. He wears clothes the whole time. Pecs are not a thing.”

Carp raises an eyebrow. “Pecs are always a thing.” He looks the monitor and begins reading. “Yes. Okay. Yes. Got it.” The assassin-in-training looks at Tinkletoes. “I see where Writer Lady is going with this. The handsome yet strangely private man living in the big house on the cliffs in a place that rains a lot, the ghostly woman in white. It’s your standard Gothic ghost story.”

“No ghostly...?” The self-proclaimed mercenary asks.

Carp grins slightly and his eyes brighten, “Well, it wouldn’t be difficult to spice things up a bit. I know I would have the firelight reveal a silhouette of what is under her thin nightdress. The man of the house would wake to find the mysterious woman in white watching him sleep. He happens to sleep in the buff, of course. There is a strange attraction regardless of the dimensions that separate them...”

The wheel of Writer Lady’s chair meets with Carp’s toe.

“Of course, Writer Lady would never do that.” He says.

“Of course not.” Tinkletoes says. “She knows that would upset me. She’s always a good girl.”

Writer Lady’s back stiffens, her face reddens, she glares at Tinkletoes. “Don’t be too sure of that.” Writer Lady begins typing, furiously.

“You go girl.” House exclaims.

You Don’t Own Me by Lesley Gore echoes around them.

Carp glances at the screen, pales, and changes the subject, “How are your gaming numbers these days? I bet you’re beating Dobby’s pants off, if he wore pants.”

Tinkletoes turns his back to Writer Lady and the computer. “Cats don’t wear pants but if he did they would be mine.”

“That good?”

“Yeah. You should have seen the move I pulled on him just the other day. It was this airborne kick while shooting thing. It’s not in the book. It’s not in any of the books.”

Carp’s eyes wander to the monitor and grow large. He quickly nods and smiles at Tinkletoes. “How did you do it? Make your character do the shooting kicking thing.”

“That’s it, I don’t know. I have been practicing my finger motions for days. I can’t seem to recreate it.”

“Oh girl, that’s my kind of stranger.” House comments.

Writer Lady grins and keeps typing.

Tinkletoes turns around and looks at the monitor. His head tilts up and down, turning in odd directions like the self-proclaimed mercenary can’t quite picture exactly what Writer Lady is describing.

Carp reads it as well, his mouth drops open. “Hmm...I never thought of...interesting.” He leans down and whispers, “I have to get him out of here, keep going, there are some people I’d like to introduce you to when this is finished.”

Writer Lady’s expression does not change, she keeps typing.

Tinkletoes looks at Carp. “What happened? This isn’t right. She can’t do this. Make it stop.”

He leans down and whispers to Writer Lady, “You’ve made your point you can stop now.”

Writer Lady types faster.

“No.” Tinkletoes says, “Don’t...do...that.” He cringes.

“Is someone talking? I’m so busy writing I can’t hear a thing.” She says.

Another sentence appears on the page.

“Wow.”

“Whoa.” Tinkletoes shakes his head. The self-proclaimed mercenary continues shaking his head. “That’s it, I’ve had enough.” He pulls back her chair and places himself between Writer Lady and her keyboard. “No more writing.”

Writer Lady looks at Tinkletoes and says, “Excuse me...” An eyebrow raises.

“No more writing.” He repeats.

Writer Lady stands up, quietly placing a hand to each hip, she looks Tinkletoes in the eyes.

Carp takes several steps back, “Oh no.”

“Here it comes.” TP giggles.


Saturday, October 9, 2021

Nathan

*No Nathans were injured or killed during the writing of this story although one self-proclaimed mercenary might not be so lucky.

 

                                                                        Nathan


Writing out the name, she underlined it. Twice. Why it needed to be underlined two times and not just one, she wasn’t quite sure. Julia never knew where stories were headed when she began writing them and this time was no different. There she sat, pen in hand, staring at the name Nathan and its lines of emphasis.

Minutes passed. She put down her pen and picked up her coffee, cradling the warm mug between her hands, Julia raised her eyes studying the coffee shop’s other patrons.

What kind of a man is this is this character Nathan? What is his story? Is it an adventure? A mystery? A love story?

Hearing raised voices coming from the front of the restaurant, Julia turned her attention in the direction of the offending sounds. A woman was leaning across a table talking to a man. The more quickly she spoke the deeper his face would redden. When the woman closed her mouth, the man opened his. The closer the man got to the end of his response the louder his voice became. He rose from his seat as he finished yelling. Tossing money on to the table in front of him, the man turned, exiting the coffee shop completely.

Julia grimaced, scrunching her nose. Maybe not a love story, she thought.

A ghost story. What about a ghost story?

Is Nathan a ghost? Is he dead?

Julia watched as a handsome gentleman stepped up to the register at the coffee shop’s counter. He smiled at the waitress and chatted a bit as he handed her cash. Julia’s eyes followed his movements as he looked around. He waved, calling out to his fellow patrons in greeting, stopping to visit with one or two of them before walking out the door.

Nathan’s not dead, Julia decided. He’s haunted.

By whom?

Julia continued looking around, her eyes stopping at a little girl playing with her doll in the booth in front of her.

A child?

She shook her head dismissing the idea the moment it emerged.

An older man? The spirit of a relative or an ancestor?

Something flickered past the corner of Julia’s eye, she turned her attention towards movement on the far side of the display window. Leaves were falling outside in bright yellows and bold reds. She watched as a waitress set paper placemats down on a freshly wiped table. They were printed with cheerful looking vampires and werewolves. The monsters stayed in place, waiting patiently for tiny hands to color them in with crayons carefully set next to the napkin dispenser.

Julia looked down at the book sitting on the table in front of her. The House Of Seven Gables by Nathaniel Hawthorne. She picked up the book. At least I know where the name came from.

She shook her head.

No, his name is Nathan not Nathaniel.


A man who appeared to be living a quiet life.

To the outside world anyway.


At night, when he was alone, things were quite different.

After darkness had fallen and all had grown quiet, his ghostly visitor would appear.


Really?” House’s voice echoes through High Command. She sighs. “Bor-ing.”

Writer Lady ignores the comment and continues to type. The theme song from Winnie-The-Pooh invades the room from another part of the house. She absentmindedly begins singing along. “Winnie-The-Pooh is coming out of my mouth while I’m writing a ghost story.” She shakes her head. “This is wrong. So wrong.” Writer Lady raises her eyes in the direction of the ceiling and calls out. “House. Activate sound proofing please.”

“Why?” House responds.

So I can continue writing undisturbed.

I don’t like it.” House says.

“I know.”

“You’re still writing it?” House asks.

“Yes. I am aware of your opinion and I would still like to continue writing, if you would please.”

The music no longer leaks into High Command. Typing commences. “This is the song that never ends. It just goes on and on my friends...”begins echoing throughout High Command.

House.” Writer Lady calls. Footsteps approach, she turns to the entry to find Dobby and Tinkletoes looking in.

“What’s going on? We can hear you in the furthest reaches of hyper space.” Tinkletoes asks.

Writer Lady raises her hands towards the ceiling. “I am working on a new story, I asked for silence and House is being House.”

Dobby nods. “I’ll get TP.” The ginger tabby disappears from sight.

Tinkletoes enters High Command. Writer Lady turns back to her story. The self-proclaimed mercenary watches her as she types. He leans forward studying the words on the screen.

“Who’s Nathan?” He asks.

Writer Lady’s face contorts into something unpleasant. “He’s one of the main characters of the story. Do you mind?”

“What’s he like?” Tinkletoes asks.

“He’s...a man?” She responds. “Living in a big house near the sea where there are cliffs and stuff.”

“Is he...hot?” The self-proclaimed mercenary asks.

“Does it matter?”

If you’re looking at his name and like thinking about him more than other people…”

Writer Lady sighs and turns around. “He’s a character on paper and I’m writing a ghost story.”

“So he’s gonna die. Cool.”

Writer Lady runs a hand across her forehead, sighs and continues typing. “Just because it’s a ghost story doesn’t mean anyone is going to die. There are lots of excellent stories where no one dies or where only the...” she pauses to glare at Tinkletoes, “...most annoying of characters suffer an untimely fate.”

The self-proclaimed mercenary grins. “You hear that House. Your days are numbered!”

Writer Lady shakes her head and returns to her work.



A ghostly presence with long flowing hair and soft blue eyes.



“Don’t you have blue eyes?” Tinkletoes asks.

Writer Lady turns and fixes her eyes on his.

“Now that you're looking at me I can see there’s nothing soft about your eyes.”

She returns to her story.


The woman wore a white nightgown trimmed in delicate lace always carrying a tall, thick, white candle as she followed Nathan through his nights.


This isn’t one of those sex books is it?”

"She's a ghost."

"Ghosts still do stuff, sometimes."

"She doesn't have a physical body."

"Can't ghosts send energy pulsing through..."

Writer Lady turns, facing Tinkletoes she sits back in the Big Writing Chair as she folds her arms in front of her.

 

 





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