The Ecstasy

“YEAH! ALRIGHT!” Laughter emerges from the room where the computer is being housed temporarily.

“Having fun with the computer Mom?” Dobby asks from his seat in the hallway.

“Yes I am.” The sound of Mom's voice moves as she physically dodges weapons fire currently attacking her avatar. “YOU SNEAKY WENCH! You brought semi-automatic weapons to a hostage negotiation! I should have known that a hulking soldier like that was nothing but trouble. I thought I could trust my own sister.” Mom says as she returns fire. “Take THAT! HA! I WON! That will teach you to screw with me.” Mom puts down the controller as she leaves the room. “I'm hungry. That game took a lot out of me.” Mom says as she heads to the kitchen. Dobby follows quietly.

“I'm really glad you and Internet could get back together Mom.” Dobby says quietly.

Mom takes her attention away from the contents of the refrigerator to study Dobby's face. “Don't worry kitty, I won't forget about you. You're my sweet baby.” Mom reaches down and scoops the large ginger tabby into her arms.

Dobby struggles against her enthusiastic attentions. “Really Mom it's okay. I know you love me. Hugs aren't necessary.” Dobby lands on the floor with a grunt and takes a minute catch his breath.

“Oh...” Mom says. “I broke the 'Don't Carry Me Around' rule again. I must have gotten excited. I forgot. I was not expecting to get Internet back so soon. The fliers didn't help but I guess either the letter to Santa or the Easter Bunny got through! Amazing how quickly the tide turns when you call the right people. We can't tell though. If we did Santa Claus would never get a minute to himself.” Mom forgets about eating in her enthusiasm. “So have you been on yet? It's really fun. You have to go surfing with me. COFFEE!!!????”

“No thanks Mom. Cats don't drink coffee, remember? You might want to back off on the coffee just a hair yourself too.”

“My hair? You don't like it?” Mom looks at Dobby crestfallen, absently twisting the ends of her freshly cut and styled hair.

“No Mom. I wanted to know how much coffee you have had today?”

Mom thinks for a minute. “I have only had the usual pot.” Mom answers turning to look at the coffee pot sitting on the counter to verify she is telling the truth.

“How many cups Mom?”

Silence.

“How many?”

“Eleven?” Mom answers quietly, looking down at the floor.

“Eleven cups of coffee!”

“It's only one pot of coffee...” Mom counters.

“That's twice what you usually drink and way above your quota.”

“But...but...”

“Mom...you know better.” Dobby admonishes.

“I made a big pot of coffee because I thought we were going to have company. The company canceled and Internet came back. I got really excited and...I forgot to stop drinking with my fifth cup of coffee. I'm...I'm sorry kitty.” Mom explains and bows her head.

Tinkletoes enters the kitchen to see Mom pouting and Dobby standing on his hind legs with his front paws on his hips looking angry.

“Dobby. My cat. What's up here? You told her didn't you?” Tinkletoes asked looking down at Dobby.

“I'm sorry Ma'am. Like I explained to Dobby I can't afford to bring you with us this year. If you want to pay your own way we would love to have you come along. You would be most welcome.” Tinkletoes says trying to remedy the situation he walked in on.

“Seriously man, if I knew it was going to be this tough I never would have made the deal with you. But a deal is a deal. A Browncoat can't afford not to collect on his debts and you already agreed. I did a fair day's work and I need you to hold up your end of the bargain.”

“Bargain?” Mom asks.

Dobby loses his authoritative stance. The cat's body tenses and he becomes ready for the attack.

“Dobby and I got you your Internet back for you. Now he owes me one.” Tinkletoes says.

“How? What do you get in return?” Mom asks.

“You're looking a little bit pale Dobby. You want me to explain it?” Tinkletoes asks looking down at Dobby. Dobby nods. “I have to tell you Ma'am this cat of yours is brilliant. If he had been around when the Alliance was taking over things would have gone way different. Dobby loves you. He saw how lost you were without Internet and so we put our heads together and figured out how to speed things along. I asked around. Actually I asked my little brother because he knows Roly, to ask Roly what we can do to get things moving along.”

“You have a brother? Who is Roly?” Mom asks.

“Yes Ma'am. A younger brother. Tiddlepants. Roly is the internet guy who works in this county. His name is Roly, short for Roly Poly, he really likes his snack cakes. Anyway Tiddles asked Roly, what can be done to move things along. Roly did not offer any help. Dobby and I set up surveillance, got to know Roly's weakness and convinced him that you were next on his work manifest.”

“You didn't?” Mom asks suddenly worried about police breaking down the front door and arresting them all.

“No Ma'am. We didn't hurt Roly. We just had a little talk in the abandoned grade school gym on the south end of town. Roly was sitting down the whole time. Dobby's idea, though that was really something. We knew Roly loved snack cakes. Snack cakes are mass produced, full of preservatives and not nearly as fresh as homemade.”

“You didn't?” Mom asks.

“Yes Ma'am we did. We used Homemade Cupcake Torture.” Tinkletoes answers with a big grin. “Roly had to watch me eat your fantabulous fancy cupcakes and he couldn't have any. When he fixed your Internet he could have the second box of cupcakes and whatever was left in the first box.”

“Thank you so much Tinkletoes for helping Dobby get my Internet back to me.”

“You are welcome Ma'am. Now Dobby needs to hold up his end of the bargain.”

“Which is?”

“He has to go with me to PhoenixComicon and get his picture taken with everyone I choose.”

“That doesn't sound so bad.” Mom answers.

“Tell her the rest.” Dobby says.

“If we run into any other important Browncoats (the actors from Firefly) he has to dress up in costume for the picture.”

“And...” Dobby says.

“He has to dress up like that actor's character.” Tinkletoes finishes.

“So if he takes a picture with Nathan Fillion he has to wear the uniform of a Browncoat?” Mom asks.

“If he is taking a picture with Ron Glass he has to dress up like Book.” Tinkletoes says.

“If Jewel Staite is there I have to wear the ruffled pink dress.” Dobby wails. 

"Complete with parasol.  Don't forget the parasol."  Tinkletoes says.

“Dobby, why did you agree to this? You hate wearing dresses.”

“Tinkletoes threw in the costume crap only after we shook paws.” Dobby answers. “Mom the costume thing shouldn't count.”
Tinkletoes takes off his knit cap and puts it on Dobby's head.

“At least Jayne's knit cap looks good.” Mom answers with her own huge grin. Sometimes life is good.