The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part X A.K.A. The X Factor

Quickly spotting the Lady with the Long Golden Hair, Writer Lady approaches the group.

A pewter toned bird is regally perched on the Lady with the Long Golden Hair's shoulder. It is Griff, a griffin that serves as the Lady's guide and another protector.

When did it get here?

Writer Lady wondered if the bird had been quietly stowed in the Lady with the Long Golden Hair's bag the entire time. Her sister did leave her purse open a lot while on the plane. Hearing Writer Lady approach, Griff turned his head towards her and lets out a loud “squawk” which in turn brought every one's attention to her.

“Hello sister.” The Lady with the Long Golden Hair greets her with a bright smile. Writer Lady can tell from the Lady with the Long Golden Hair's tone and smile her mission is going well. Introductions are made. She quietly listens as they continue their discussion. Writer Lady can tell from the Master of Ink's knowledge of almost everything why the Lady with the Long Golden Hair is on a mission to speak to this man. He is one of her peers, the knowledge the Lady with the Long Golden Hair takes in would be very useful for accomplishing their other goal.

Writer Lady takes a moment to get a better look at her surroundings. The table sitting in front of the Master of Inks is covered with prints of beautifully detailed drawings of dragons, clocks, books, tea sets and other intricately drawn items. There are copies of the Master of Inks' books. Ink is used for all kinds of things. Writing as well as drawings. There also bookmarks along with other promotional items.

Then she sees them!

 

On the far back corner of the table sits a box of Nutty Bars. Peanut butter wafer cookies dipped in chocolate. It's been a really tough day, the coffee has worn off making her tired, lunch was thirty minutes ago. No one is talking to her right now. Who is going to miss one Nutty Bar? Seriously.

“No...” TP bellows.

“No what?” Writer Lady asks with her mind.

“No touchy touchy.”

“What?”

“No cookie for you.” TP says. “You say you are afraid of men but first you complement one man's saber and now you want to eat another man's Nutty Bar. Harlot.”

“It's a cookie. A snack. They're all over the place.”

“The Nutty Bar is the Master of Ink's signature snack. You don't touch a man's signature snack uninvited. You never accept an invitation to eat a signature snack from a married man.”

“So what are you saying? Are you telling me accepting a man's signature snack is the Geek version of 'You want a piece of candy?' That's sick. Completely sick.”

“You are a guest in this world, Writer Lady. It is impolite to judge.” TP reminds her. “Your actions are not exactly pure of intention to them.”

“I already look like an oversexed slut. Yeah. I get it.” Writer Lady says.

I already have a bad reputation. Is it really a big deal to sacrifice more of my reputation in the name of hunger? He might be flattered.

“He might be flattered if you had bothered to shave your legs.” The Warrior with the Intense Blue Eyes admonishes Writer Lady telepathically.

“Nice trick nephew. Relax, I'll just stand like I've shaved my legs.”

“What?”

“You know with the fabric of my jeans touching my legs. You would never do that when your legs are like...ow!” Writer Lady takes in a sharp breath.

“You were saying?” Warrior with Intense Blue Eyes teases.

“It's really not going to make a difference. It's one Nutty Bar.” Writer Lady justifies.

“Griff!” The Warrior with Intense Blue Eyes calls to the bird with his mind.   The Griffin rises from his perch on the Lady with the Long Golden Hair's shoulder, flying over the Master of Ink's head close and fast like a fighter plane buzzing the tower. Griff hit the Nutty Bar box from the back side knocking it into the floor.

“I'll get it.” Writer Lady offers, eagerly picking up the box, which proves to be...empty.

“Thanks.” Says the Master of Inks, taking the empty cookie box and throwing it away in a nearby can.

Griff having already returned to the Lady with the Long Golden Hair's shoulder is being scolded for his outrageous behavior.

“Are you sure you're alright, sir?” the Lady asks.

“Yes of course.”

“I'm so sorry. Griff never behaves this way.” The Lady with the Long Golden Hair says.

“Quite alright. It was nice meeting you all. I have to be on my way now. I have a lunch meeting with the Queen of the Amazing Fro and the other members of the Colorful Court.”

Writer Lady watches the Master of Inks as he takes his leave. “How come he gets food and I don't?”

“Because my sister you are on a Quest.”

“You can't eat until your work is done be-yotch!” The Warrior with the Intense Blue Eyes teases. “Sam and Frodo didn't eat and neither will you.”

“ 'Cuse me. They had Lambdas bread. Hel-lo! Where's my bread?” Writer Lady asks.

“No Carbs!” TP bellows shaking the ground below.

“You're kidding me right?” Writer Lady says. “What happens now.”

“What did the Lord and the Lady of the Drawn Story say?” The Lady with the Long Golden Hair asks.

“They said I have to go to this ball tonight. It's held by the Queen of the Amazing 'Fro. I'll meet the queen and request a meeting with the Gem of the Con who will also be there. Dobby's fate will be decided then.”

“Let's get going. There's so much to do.” The Lady with the Long Golden Hair says.

“Is the weed whacker in the suitcase, or your carry on bag?” The Warrior with the Intense Blue Eyes teases.

“Why me. Why?” Writer Lady groans.

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part VIIII

Writer Lady's cell phone rings. She takes it out of her purse and answers. “Hello?”

“This time lis-ten!” TP says through giggles. “Say, 'Yes. That was it. Did you get it?'

“Yes. That was it. Did you get it?”

“Nod a lot. This was something being recorded for an on line show. Say something that explains the outburst.” TP instructs.

“I can't believe I made first audition recording. This is so cool!” Writer Lady says into the phone. “I get to cross that off of my bucket list.”

“Now thank everyone and tell them it will be available for watching on You Tube. Soon. Not too soon. That way everyone has a chance to forget about it.” TP instructs.

Writer Lady lowers the phone and blushes slightly. Looking around she says, “I would like to thank everyone here for cooperating. I was filming an audition for a new reality show. It will be posted on You Tube next month with the other auditions. The show is called (clearing throat)  'Geekzillas, smart women with bad attitudes and the Geeks who love them'.” Her face bright red, Writer Lady finds a nearby dark corner and picks the cell phone back up.

“That was good. Will you listen to my instructions now?” TP asks.

“Yes, of course any help you could give me is greatly appreciated.”

“Make your way, past the Ewoks, slowly this time, there are children in those costumes. No more Godzilla impressions, okay?”

“You know I would never intentionally run over anyone especially a child. Shame on you.”

“Not five minutes ago...” TP sings in her ear.

“This is stressful. I haven't eaten since this morning either! Are we going to do this or what?”

“Patience. Writer Lady, patience.”

“If I had a dollar for every time someone said that on this trip. I'd have lunch already.”

“You are on a quest, silly lady, food comes later. To locate the Lady with the Long Golden Hair you must follow the pirates.”

“Pirates?” Writer Lady looks a the man standing to her left side. He is dressed up like a much loved pirate character that is quite easy on the eyes. Using her telepathy, “TP, what is a pirate doing at Comic-con?”

“They belong to the Lady with the Long Golden Hair. They are her decoys. Follow the pirate and I will explain.” Shoving the cell phone back into her bag, she follows the pirate. Writer Lady makes her way further into the Hall of Distractions. The pirate moves through the crowds with ease. He has been to these places before. Often.

“You know that the Lady with the Long Golden Hair is enchanting to men. Single men only. Unfortunately, there are odd exceptions. Some men are looking for another woman no matter what. If they look long enough and hard enough at the Lady with the Long Golden Hair they can be attracted to her. This is not usually a problem, sometimes there is a woman with them that does not take kindly to his attraction. The man is at fault but the Lady with the Long Golden Hair is blamed. The decoys protect your sister from these women.”

“Just a couple of hours ago you said that Merlin fixed that problem for our ancestor.”

“Merlin did his best. One must have fallen through the cracks.”

“So in other words...”

“Merlin made a boo-boo!” TP giggles.

“How much of a boo boo? How much danger is the Lady with the Long Golden Hair in?”

“Not much. Most descendants of the Enchantress' have women attacking all of the time. They don't even go to events like this. The women would be lined up to attack. Because of Merlin's blunder your sister rarely has any trouble. At an event of this size she may have three women try something. Which is where the decoys come in. Instead of a body guard which can quickly and efficiently do their job but can put a damper on a situation; the Lady with the Long Golden Hair uses the decoys. They are dressed as an attractive and well known actor. The decoy approaches an attacker before she even has a chance to say anything to your sister. The woman is surprised, distracted and completely charmed by the decoy. She is usually so excited by the decoy paying attention to her the man she is with comes out of his enchantment and quickly escorts her from the perimeter.”

“What is this pirate doing now?”

“He is one of six. They walk a 500 square foot perimeter around the Lady with the Long Golden Hair. They monitor the moods of the women in her immediate vicinity. The Lady with the Long Golden Hair sent this decoy to lead to you to her. It was an efficient way for the two of you to meet up again.” 

 

The Lady with the Long Golden Hair and the Warrior with Intense Blue Eyes are at a folding table on a busy corner of the author's section.  On the other side of the table stood the Master of Inks. The Master of Inks was a jovial looking man with dark blonde hair and blue eyes. Everyone at the table was talking, smiling and having a good time.

“That's the Master of Inks?” Writer Lady asks.

“Is there a problem?” TP's voice bellows in her mind.

“The way you described him, I expected him to be more...intimidating. If he can draw someone out of our world completely and into another shouldn't he have minions or something?”

“Not all power is evil, Writer Lady.” TP answers. “But it should still be respected.”

Writer Lady slows her walk, “Any last minute advice TP?”

“Be a lady. Don't touch anything!"

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part VIII

Writer Lady swallows her initial panic and takes a deep breath. Tickets and particulars in hand Writer Lady takes her leave of the Lord and the Lady of the Drawn Story.  She thanks them for their time. It was clear to her the Drawn Story was well looked after and it would be for some time, Writer Lady was sure of that.   She heads on her way.  Out the door.

“Where are you going?” TP's voice demands.

Writer Lady stops just under the Exit sign. “Away from here,” the mental telepathy kicking in as she answers.

“Why?” TP asks.

“It's a ball. With people, music, dancing. Men! There will be men there. I'm not comfortable with this. I have to go.” Writer Lady says and continues walking only to be stopped before she reaches the door. “I can't move.”

“Because TP doesn't understand. You go against Merlin's wishes because you fear men?”

“It's more complicated than that.”

“How can it be so complicated? These men seem to like you well enough.”

“I'm not talking to them privately am I?”

“The Lord of the Drawn story.” TP asks.

“That's business. Business is easier.”

“The stormtrooper?”

“Still giddy from the flight and a caffeine buzz.” Writer Lady answers still struggling.

“Tinkletoes.”

“You have to ask. Seriously?”

A countdown tune starts playing in Writer Lady's head.

“It's different. He's there to see Dobby. Besides I have the home field advantage. Can I go now?”

“You may go find your sister. For you all exits are blocked.”

Writer Lady takes another step forward right into a short burst of energy. “Ow!”

“Silly lady. Merlin does not like to hear the word 'No'.”

“I'm not giving up.  I just don't like being shocked. Where's this ink picture drawing guy?”

“Writer Lady has no manners. Shame, shame.” TP admonishes as if she were a child with her elbows on the dining table. “The Lady with the Long Golden Hair is meeting with the Master of Inks. Do not insult the Master, my Lady, your future is still uncertain.”

“He draws pictures all day what can he do to me?”

“The last person that insulted the Master was redrawn completely.”

“Do you mean like drawing a big curly evil villain mustache on my face? Or something more like 'I'm not really a bad girl. I'm just drawn that way.'” Writer Lady asks.

“Master of Inks had his powers before 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit?'. Silly Lady.” TP giggles. “Master of Inks can recreate you in pen and ink into anything he wants to. When you appear on his page you disappear from your world.” TP's voice bellows.

“Really?   So there's still a chance I don't have to go to this party?”

“On your way,"  a much louder and more intimidating voice bellows.

“TP,  was that?” Writer Lady asks.

“GO!”

“Okay. I'm going.” Writer Lady turns away from the the doors heading into the throng of pedestrians winding through the Hall of Distractions.

“TP! Which way?”

“(sound of throat clearing...) If you proceed forward past Darth Vader and Gandalf, take a left past Iron man, then go around the bounty hunters and stormtroopers that are...”

Writer Lady walks through the gathering of armored and armed of the Evil Empire forging a path that rivaled Godzilla.

“Wait a minute. You're supposed to be shy remember?”

“You pissed me off. I'm hungry too. Besides we're not there yet. I don't do shy until I'm faced with the dragon itself.”

“Will you be shy for the Master of Inks?” TP asks.

“That depends.” Writer Lady thinks. “On how long before I get something to eat.” She stops walking and looks around. “TP?”

“Yes?”

“I'm lost again.”

“Promise to wait until I finish with the directions this time?”

“Just point me somewhere and I'll go. Tell me what it looks like so I'll know I've arrived at the correct destination.”

“Patience my lady. Do you promise to wait until I've finished?”

Writer Lady rolls her eyes and says, “Yes I promise to wait until you finished talking. Now tell me already!” forgetting to use her mind instead of her mouth. The noises around her stop.   People are staring.  Magical creatures and dark lords are paling.  Parents with children are quickly slipping past avoiding eye contact.

“AWK—WARD...You forgot to talk with your mind. Silly Lady.” She can here TP giggling with abandon inside her head.

“I know that little faerie is somewhere Rolling On the Floor Laughing” Writer Lady mutters, waiting for the floor to open up so she can disappear completely.

The Quest For Dobby's Destiny Part VII

“Would you like to sit down?” The Lord of the Drawn Story asks.

Writer Lady nods and they all take a seat at one of the tables set up in the center of the Lord and Lady's main booth.

“Dobby, the hero of Tinkletoes' stories. The amazing cat that talks.”

“Yes. Dobby is my cat. He really does talk.”

The Lord and Lady of the Drawn Story's faces pale slightly, they look at each other for a moment and then look back at Writer Lady.

“At first I was worried I was going crazy too. Then, I thought at the very least Dobby's talking was a freakishly strong version of the auditory hallucinations that can be associated with some anxiety disorders. My husband had died after all. That is until I was introduced to Tinkletoes. He had been talking to Dobby for a while at that point.” (See Invasion! And Invasion! II posts from November 2012)

“I remember that Tinkletoes was bragging about how he was going to take down some aliens from outer space and then sent me this outrageous story about how his client was a talking cat. The talking cat had a human mother.” The Lord says. “I had to explain to him how that was possible. Pet adoption. That for some people their pets are their children. In Dobby's case, the cat clearly saw you as Mom the same way you saw Dobby as your baby.”

“Thank you.” Writer Lady answers.

“It was not easy. The Lord had to draw a few pictures.” The Lady explains.

“Actually, my marker ran out of ink. So one of the kids I teach drawing to took over. Tinkletoes understood once she explained it.” The Lord pointed out. “After that he decided having to see you wasn't too bad as long as he could still hang out with Dobby.”

“Having to see me?” Writer Lady questioned. Wrestling with getting mad and deciding against it. “Dobby is my baby and as long as Dobby is happy Tinkletoes will be welcome in my house.” The Lord and Lady nod.

“As soon Dobby isn't happy that ya-hoo's butt is out of there.” She muttered to herself.

“I heard that. I heard that. I'm gonna tell.” TP sings out.

“Is that faerie going to comment the whole time?” The Lord asks. “Because he's annoying.”

“You're telling me.” Writer Lady agrees. “That is TP. The TP stands for Totally Pixelated.”

“The one that played with the pixies so much it made him silly?” The Lord of the Drawn Story asks.

 “We should have known who that voice belonged to.” The Lady commented with a smile.

“You know about TP too huh?”

“You can see now why I was so surprised to read so many amazing stories. I...we, couldn't believe he had that kind of imagination. Tinkletoes has never exhibited storytelling, much less, writing skills then for him put up a blog...” The Lord of the Drawn Story explains.

“A blog? Really? May I see it?” Writer Lady asks.

“Sure.” The Lord of the Drawn Story reaches for an electronic tablet at the far end of the work table. He pulls up the most recent blog post and hands the tablet over to her.

Writer Lady starts reading her blog's most recent post. It's not under the title “Saturday Night Silliness.” Tinkletoes calls this one “Tinkletoes Amazing Stories”. The anger rises. Writer Lady thinks for a minute, lets it go and says, “Yep. That's it. That's our blog. We both have individual blog sites but we work together and post them at both places.”

“Great idea. You get twice as many readers.” The Lord of the Drawn Story comments.

“He has other stuff on his blog too. Gun safety information. Lightsaber design. Mine is just the stories.” She comments.

“You are a writer then?” The Lord of the Drawn Story asks.

Writer Lady hesitates before she answers. “I would like to say yes but the posts aren't really stories as much as they are my um...journal.” She answers.

“All of this stuff really happened? Everyone really exists? Even the dragon?” The Lord asks.

"Yes, except for the book I wrote that created the dragon, Furnatche and the other characters.  They came to life as I wrote the book and came into the real world later."  She tries to explain not sure how crazy she sounds.

The Lord and the Lady of the Drawn Story look at each other with concern.

“Why are you telling us this?” The Lord asks. “You could let everyone believe you are just an imaginative person. You and Tinkletoes cooked the blogs up to get your stories out there.” 

 Unsure of what to say, Writer Lady decides to talk about her quest. “I am here because Merlin sent me. I was to come to you and verify the facts regarding Tinkletoes' stories. Also, I need to seek an audience with the Gem of the Con.”

“Regarding?”

“Dobby entering the World of Adoration? Merlin says it's Dobby's destiny."  Writer Lady answers.  "I don't think it's a good idea at all. The cat is way too hard to live with already.”

The Lord turns to his Lady. “What do you think?”

“If she was not speaking the truth, Buzz the stormtrooper would never have let her through. He is in charge of the soul scans and she comes under Merlin's orders.”

“Sometimes we have imposters, darling. Remember 18 years ago, the talking pig. Merlin was wrong about that one.”

“No dear that was Merlot that sent her. Merlin's cousin once removed.”

“Yes. Now I remember, the soul scan didn't work on him. Our previous guard was older. He had been suffering from cataracts and didn't tell anyone.” The Lord of the Drawn Story explains to Writer Lady.

“The poor dear couldn't see Lord Vader coming at him if he had infrared binoculars built in at that point.” The Lady continued.

“We let the pig in and have never had a peaceful court meeting since. The squealing voice she speaks with is terrible.” The Lord says.

“The buffets are always so lovely. No one gets anything to eat anymore.”

“She hogs all the food.” The Lord finishes his Lady's thought.

“You will get to see exactly what we mean when you go to the ball.”

“What?” Writer Lady asks.

“When you go to the ball. In order to get an audience with the Gem of the Con this time of year you must go to the ball that is held by the Queen of the Amazing 'Fro and Her Most Colorful Court.”

“I don't have to show my legs do I?” Writer Lady mumbles.

“I'm sorry I didn't hear you clearly.” The Lady says.

“I have no idea what I'll wear.”

“We all have those difficulties. Balls are so rare these days. It is hard to be comfortable in all of that formality. Choose something fun, colorful and comfortable is good too. It is going to be stressful enough spending time in the presence of the Gem of the Con without fiddling with an uncomfortable dress all night.” The Lady of the Drawn Story says, patting Writer Lady's hand. “Don't worry my dear. It will be fine.”

Merlin turned off Writer's Lady's telepathic capabilities moments before her brain started screaming in panic.