What Bubba Yaya Wants

*This post includes an excerpt from the short story "The Librarian" by HR Apostos.

 

Tinkletoes/John looks at Carp and grins. “Maybe the stuff in those girlie books you used to write isn’t such a bad thing.” The self-proclaimed mercenary puckers his lips.

Francesca takes a step back. “No,” she says.

“No?”

“I will not kiss you. There is an active contract out on you.”

“Don’t start anything that’s doomed to fail?” Writer Lady asks.

Francesca nods.

“Hmm.” Writer Lady nods her assent. She can respect that philosophy. Most of Francesca’s acquaintances will probably go under contract eventually, not making them good candidates for a long term relationship.

Tinkletoes/John studies Francesca for a moment. He shakes his head. “I don’t believe you. You’re attracted to me.”

“I will not kiss you.”

Tinkletoes/John looks at Francesca. “Do you mind?”

She backs away further.

Tinkletoes/John steps towards Writer Lady and the computer monitor. He begins reading. He raises his arm and points with his good hand. “See that? Francesca went home and I was in the car.”

Writer Lady looks at Tinkletoes, “The assassin was in the car.”

“Yeah. It’s who I’m dressed up as. She takes me home.”

Francesca’s gray eyes look at Tinkletoes/John. They are an unusually cold color and remind the self-proclaimed mercenary of his favorite gun. “Just because you were in my house does not mean anything happened.”

Determined to prove that he is right and Francesca is wrong because damn-it he’s irresistible. Grandma said it all the time. The dead one, not the one from the blog. She’s the angry one. He begins reading the story to Francesca. Pointing dramatically to himself whenever his/John’s/youknowwhoImean’s name comes up.

Francesca entered the housing complex through a rarely used side gate. The front gate was for any and all residents and visitors. The back gate was for employees and residents who were currently keeping a low profile. Few knew about the side gate near her unit. It was automated and only a handful of residents had access. She had top tier security clearance which meant the details she shared with security regarding visitors to her home was at her discretion. She paid extra for that. Expensive but worth it.

“Sit up in the back so the camera can verify a person is in the back seat.” She said. She felt his glare and looked at him in the rear view mirror. “It’s infrared. Low resolution. It will confirm another person is in the car. Nothing more.”

“That doesn’t sound very secure.”

“I am only one who is currently enjoying this service.” She countered.

An indicator light turned green, the gate lifted, and Francesca eased her car on to her street. No words were exchanged until they entered the house and she had reset the alarm for Resident At Home/Evening.

“I don’t know why you want…” He began.

“Shh…” Francesca called Security.

“Yes?” The guard answered.

“This is Unit 5-1-5. I would like to announce a guest.”

“Go ahead.”

“Male. Six-one. One hundred eighty five pounds. Dark hair and eyes. His name is...Jovan.”

“Jo-van?” He whispered.

“Category?” Security asked.

“E-6.”

“Duration of stay?”

Francesca looked at him, studying his torn and dirtied suit. “He’s a bit rough around the edges, I haven’t decided how long I'll retain him.”

“Notify us as soon as you have a departure date. Let your guest know he is welcome to enjoy all E approved services and amenities. May he enjoy his visit. Thank you for calling.”

“Thank you.”

“Have a nice evening.”

“You too.” Francesca responded as she ended the call.

“E-6?”

“I had to give them a reason a strange man would be in my home for several days that would not raise suspicion.”

He raised his brow.

“While you are staying here you are my escort.”

He walked to the door.

“Am I that unattractive?” Francesca asked.

“No, it’s just...I’m not that kind of man.”

“I’m not that kind of man?” Tinkletoes/John repeats. “I wouldn’t say that.”

Writer Lady looks at Carp.

Carp looks at Writer Lady. “I’ve had this talk plenty of times, allow me.” He looks at Tinkletoes/John and crooks his finger. “Come here.” The assassin-in-training begins. “I have five words for you that are absolutely going to change the course of your life.” He looks Tinkletoes/John in the eyes and says. “It’s not about you.”

Tinkletoes/John makes a face. “Well?”

“Well what?”

“What’s the fifth word? It’s not about you is four words.”

“The number of words is not important what’s important is the message. This is not about you.”

“Of course it’s about me. I’m that assassin guy. It’s all about me. Him. Me.” Tinkletoes looks confused for a moment. “It’s about me.” He emphasizes.

Tinkletoes/John turns to look at Francesca and smiles.

Carp gently turns his head back the other way.

“I know. There’s a pretty lady in the room. I know. This really is not about you. It’s about acting out Writer Lady’s story to see if it really does belong in John Wick’s world or if she should toss the setting out like a bad burrito and start fresh. What’s most important is figuring out where Francesca belongs.”

“That’s easy. She belongs here.” Tinkletoes/John turns to look at Francesca. “With me.” He smiles at her.

She looks at Tinkletoes/John and shakes her head. She points to her temple indicating Tinkletoes/John has a thick skull. She looks at Writer Lady. “He does not understand the story.”

Tinkletoes/John returns to Writer Lady. Turning the chair around he looks her in the eyes and says, “Don’t listen to her. I do understand the story. I just think it’s time for a re-write.” The self-proclaimed mercenary/assassin looks at Carp. “That’s the word isn’t it? Re-write?”