Sunday, January 1, 2023

Once Upon A Christmas Wish: The Hard Things

Is there something I need to know?” Lisa asked.

I’m not sure now is the right time to discuss it.”

Lisa reached into her purse. “I know what it is a good time for. One of those dark chocolate mint brownies. Would you go get three please?” She asked Phoebe handing her some money. “Thank you Sweetie.”

Lisa pounced the moment we were alone. “Spill.”

I don’t like him.” I said.

Seriously? Mac is one of the nicest men I’ve ever spoken to.”

Of course he’s nice to you. All men are. You’re gorgeous.”

You’re beautiful too and a successful novelist to boot.”

I looked over at the counter to make sure Phoebe was still waiting in line. “I have found him to be rude, bossy, and obnoxious.”

Lisa looked confused.

Mr. McKinley or Mac, as you call him, showed up the morning after I arrived, physically pulled me into the house without identifying himself and proceeded to steamroll me with orders on how to live in the wild. He’s a dick.”

Lisa burst out laughing.

What’s so funny?”

That’s it? That’s why you don’t like him, a bad first impression?”

I shook my head. “When I tried to smooth things over by introducing myself more formally he did it again. Judging me when I told him I write romance novels for a living, accusing me of giving women ridiculous ideas of what to expect in a healthy relationship before he’s ever read one of my books.”

Mac used to volunteer as an EMT. He cared for a man who nearly died, it was an animal attack. Mac shot the bear before it could finish the job. Seeing what a bear could do to a person up close was hard to process, he left the mountain for a while because of it. Mac came back after his father died to help with the family business. When he saw the bear so close to you he reacted without thinking. He’s probably still working through some things.”

How do you know all of this?”

It came up when I called about the house. He said it was a family home which he’d recently updated. You know how chatty I can be. The details just kind of came out. He might have shared that information with you if you had talked to him instead of getting mad and dismissing him.”

It was my turn to look confused.

He mentioned you two got off on the wrong foot when Phoebe and I were in line. Phoebe mentioned we were visiting her Aunt Jess. He asked if I was the woman who called about the house, the conversation took off from there.”

Okay, provided I decide to forgive him for the manhandling, your explanation does not excuse his comments about the evil doings of romance novelists.”

Maybe something bad happened that he associates with romance novels in general.” Lisa suggested.

What could possibly have happened? Did he witness a stack of romance novels attacking someone in the middle of the local library?”

Lisa made a face, she was irritated. “He’s been very kind every time I’ve talked to him. Phoebe has taken to him as well. Since we like him, could you keep an open mind?”

I chose not to respond. I looked in McKinley’s direction. Sure enough, Phoebe was standing in line, talking to McKinley who was sitting on a stool at the counter. He was laughing at something Phoebe said really hard. I looked at the other people around him. They were looking at him and smiling. Everyone seemed to be having a good time. Everyone seemed to like him, everyone except me.

Mac says he’s not a mountain man.” Phoebe announced upon returning with our brownies. “I don’t believe him. Mr. Baker agreed with Mac. He said if Mac is anything he’s a tree hugger.”

What did you say to that?” I asked.

The eight year old girl shrugged. “I didn’t know anyone could do that for a living. I think Mr. Baker was pulling my leg.”

How do you know he was pulling your leg?”

The trees here are too big for anyone to hug. Even a man as big as Mac can’t get his arms around the trunks to hug them. Men.” Phoebe said, a tired sigh escaping before she took a bite of her brownie.

You’re becoming quite the woman of the world aren’t you?” I asked.

She’s 8 going on 38.” Lisa looked at her daughter. “Eat your brownie.”



I spent the next morning writing in my bedroom only stopping to go downstairs and eat breakfast. It was Lisa and Phoebe’s day in the kitchen. They insisted and considering where I was with the book I didn’t argue. I offered to do the dishes before returning to work. Writing the final days I spent with my mother was hard. Her pain, knowing what was coming and having no idea what to say. We spent a lot of that time during those long hours in the hospital remembering. Christmases, birthdays, all those precious times that were just ours. I remember the hospital room feeling heavy with the weight of knowing there would not be next Christmases or any more birthdays together. I could not seem to give her enough hugs. I lost count of how many times I said, “I love you.” It was like I was hoping those three words had the power to keep her alive and with me longer.

It was a long, difficult day of writing but I wouldn’t let myself stop until all the words had been written, until I had started another section of the book, one describing the years spent learning how to write. The journey taken while writing the first two novels. The novels I wrote before Lisa and Phoebe came into my life.

I was taking a brief break when I noticed a weather alert on my laptop. A snowstorm that was expected later in the evening was moving faster than initially predicted. Several inches of snow were expected to fall in a matter of a few hours causing white out conditions along with a dangerously low wind chill.

Checking the radar map, I noticed the storm would be moving into the area within the hour. I decided it would be a good idea to go downstairs and make sure Lisa knew what was going on. I also wanted to verify that Phoebe was close by. I opened the bedroom door to find a note taped on the other side.


Phoebe and I are going sledding.

Mr. Baker said the best hills are at the

park. We’ll be back in time for dinner.--Lisa & Phoebe



I went downstairs and looked outside. Lisa’s rental was still in the drive. So was mine. There was no way they could make it back before the storm hit if they were traveling on foot. I went back inside to grab blankets, water, and snacks. I bundled up, grabbing my keys before I left the house.

The snow was already falling hard by the time I reached Lodgepole Falls and found the local park empty. The back-up plan was to drive home as slowly as possible and pick them up on their way back. I decided to stop at the coffee house before leaving town. I wanted to check and see if they had been by before continuing home. Mr. Baker said most people had gone home a while ago. Rides were organized to get anyone who was on foot home safe before the storm arrived. From the tone of his voice I got the impression it was standard protocol. For me, the information was a huge relief. I thanked Mr. Baker, reassuring him I was headed back to the house myself to wait out the storm.

The SUV I rented when I arrived did a great job over terrain that was growing more uneven with each passing minute. Unfortunately, even all wheel drive cannot compensate for the fact that I was not used to driving in a snow storm. The light bouncing off the snow as it fell created a strange surreal effect of being surrounded by this strange silent white tornado (albeit, a slow moving one). I found it difficult discerning exactly what to focus on. I don’t have much trouble driving through rain. But rain is translucent, snow is not.

The GPS stopped working a few minutes after I left town. With the sky darkening quickly, it wasn’t long before I found myself on a road I didn’t recognize. I had no clue as to how to get back to the main road. Pulling the vehicle over, I put the SUV in park. I looked at my surroundings and watched as the snow swirled around outside my windows. I wondered how long I could sit before the storm let up and I could find my way home. I also wondered how much time would pass before someone came looking for me. Pulling the blankets off the back seat, I wrapped them around me before moving the snacks and water to the passenger seat. Turning off the engine, I settled in to wait. It was going to be a long night.

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