I Saw A Bug -- Bonus Post

Dobby enters computer room (A.K.A. High Command). He is walking slowly and with purpose. The gas mask he is wearing is military grade circa World War II and is very heavy. Dobby stops next to the table Mom is sitting at and through short heavy breaths says, “Is it okay to come out now?”

“Yes of course it is kitty why wouldn't it be? You sound a little bit funny are you okay?” Mom turns from the monitor to glance over at her ginger tabby. “Dobby! Take that gas mask off. It didn't smell that bad.”

“Mom...it kinda did.”

“You're exaggerating.”

“If you get mad at me again just say so, don't try to kill me slowly next time okay? I didn't get any sleep today until I found this old gas mask. I think Tinkletoes left it last week.”

“I wasn't doing that to hurt you Dobby. That strong odor was bug spray. I saw that huge poisonous bug last night in the living room. Bugs do not live in this house, they belong outside. When they come inside they have to die.”

“You killed and or ran that bug off last night what was today all about?” Dobby asks.

Mom looks around the room and up at the attic above her head. Shifting her eyes from side to side suspiciously, she leans in to Dobby and whispers, “To kill the others.”

“What others? We have been here for three months if there were other bugs I would have seen them. Trust me there are no others.”

“That was what everyone who helped me move said too. 'Great place. No signs of bugs or anything, how did you find it?' But...what did I see last night? A BUG. A bug in this house must die. They all must DIE. Mwahahaha... (evil genius laugh). 
 (To the tune of Epiphany from Sweeney Todd) They all deserve to die, tell you why little Dobby tell you why...”

 

Note to the folks at PETA: Mom is not usually this blood thirsty but she is a big girl about bugs and she has had a little too much caffeine today. I hope your organization takes these circumstances into consideration before any action is taken. Sincerely Yours, Dobby.

“What if that was the one and only bug? The first bug. The scout bug?” Dobby asks. “If you hadn't have killed it he could have gone back with a message that this house was not the place to inhabit. Now the bug is dead, they will have to send another scout... This break down in communication could lead to a lot more visitors before everything gets sorted out.”

“You're right kitty. Don't worry. I can fix this. Think Honey think!” Mom's face lights up. “Dobby come with me.” Mom says grabbing the Big Red Flashlight. “We have to find that bug. Dead or alive he will carry our message back to his colony and redirect them someplace else. That Big Ass Bug is going to save his family from certain death, that scout will be famous for generations to come. Go put your headlamp on and let's get to work.”