“Cheese balls?”
Writer Lady asks.
“Yeah, TP
coated the cheese balls with some magic stuff that streamlined them.
So they would go faster.”
“Did they?”
“Oh yeah.”
Ray answers with a grin. “The first ones moved so fast that they
burned the plastic. No track could hold them. So TP made them fly.”
“Flying would be
the next logical step.” Writer Lady agrees.
“TP filled a bag
with faerie dust. He put another slick coating on over that so we
didn't lose any speed. Those balls were flying everywhere. Across
the floor, on to the furniture. They made bright orange tracks along
the walls. The walls looked really cool. You would have loved it
man. TP said some words and waved his hands and then those cheese
balls really picked up speed. One took out a lamp. Another one
broke that ugly glass thing everyone avoids but you never put flowers
in.”
“My great-
great-great grandmother's vase?”
Ray nods.
“The one that
was supposed to have sunk on the Titanic but her best friend saved it
by holding like it was a baby until she reached dry land. That one?”
“Ye...yeah.”
Ray says.
Writer Lady's face
contorts into something scary. She takes a deep breath and her face
relaxes. She says, “Continue.”
“The first
cheese ball flew into Diomedes' mouth by accident. The rest just
like...followed.”
“Diomedes
ate a whole bag of cheese balls?”
Ray
nods.
“A
whole bag of cheese balls
that had been rolling all
over the dirty carpet, furniture, walls, then been coated with
magical goo?” Writer Lady asks.
“How
dirty do you mean? Because the
carpet looked
okay to me.”
“Clean
but not clean enough to eat off of.”
“Oh.”
Ray says
paling a little.
“Faerie
dust. They had faerie dust
on them too.” He reminds
her.
“No.
Let's not forget that. TP
uses that dust for just about everything. We have no clue what's in
that! No wonder the poor dragon is sick.” Writer Lady's eyes scan
the room looking for the guilty party. TP has not moved from his
spot near the monitor. Watching and giggling as Tinkletoes, Dobby,
House, and Mural Man try to help Diomedes. “You.” She says
glaring at the faerie.
“Ooops.
Time to go.” TP says.
“Not
so fast.” Writer Lady says, catching him in her hands. “You
have made a mess. A big one. It's time you helped clean it up.”
A
high pitched noise is heard coming from Writer Lady's closed hands.
“What?” She asks.
“Let
me.” Ray leans down and puts an ear to Writer Lady's hands.
“Say
that again TP.” Writer Lady says.
TP
repeats himself.
“Romantic
quest.” Ray says. “He can't help because it Tinkletoes'
romantic quest.”
“Romantic
quest! Ask TP how many romantic quests are there in which the
ill-behaved imp who started it to begin with sits on the sidelines,
watches, and laughs.”
Ray
listens. “More
than you think?” He
interprets.
Writer
Lady shakes her head. “He tried but this is not your typical
situation. Tinkletoes deserves more help, help from you TP
and he's going to get it.”
There
is more high-pitched chattering.
“You'll
cut off Tinkletoes' nuts.” Ray reminds her.
“Surely
Tinkletoes has more confidence than to think that fixing one mess
like this makes him a bigger man.”
More
chatter.
“TP
says he doesn't think he is and you'll be cutting off his nuts.”
“Fine.”
Writer Lady says. “When this is all over I'll sew them back on
again. He won't even know they're gone.”
Ray
raises his head and stands up. “I hate to tell you this man. But
I think he's gonna notice.”
“I'll
have to find a way to make it up to him then won't I? I'll owe him
one.”
“It
might not be a complete disaster.” Ray assents.
“Maybe if you invented some super delicious new Dragon Slayer
cupcakes. He might feel better.”
Peter
and Dylan return from outside in time to hear about the food.
“I
know goodies always make me feel better.” Ray says.
Dylan
looks at Ray and nods in agreement.
“So
losing your masculinity is okay as long as there are cupcakes?”
Writer Lady asks. “That's the message I'm getting.”
Ray,
Peter, and Dylan all look at each other. “It helps.” Dylan
says.
Diomedes
stands in the center of the living room. The dragon is changing
colors more slowly and he seems less stressed.
“It
was the cheese balls. Dragons must be allergic to cheese balls.”
Dobby says.
“Are
you, um...lactose intolerant?” Mural Man asks.
“No.” Diomedes answers. “I am a magical creature. I can eat whatever I
like and reject whatever I don't like. It all metabolizes the same.”
“When
you reject it? How does a dragon do that?” Mural Man asks.
“I
say, “Eu...” and make a disagreeable face.”
“You
don't eat it?” Tinkletoes asks.
“Only
one bite.” Diomedes responds.
“A
rejected food wouldn't do this then.” Tinkletoes says.
“That
is correct.” The dragon agrees.
“Then
it must be some type of parasite.” Mural Man says.
Tinkletoes
looks at Mural Man, “What? Did Monitor Man play a veterinarian
once too?”
“He
auditioned for a role as a zoologist. Unfortunately, he didn't get
it.”
“Yeah,
well you win some and you lose some.” Tinkletoes says looking
briefly towards the bonus room. Tinkletoes
looks back at Diomedes. “If
you've got some kind of bug or worm living in there it only means one
thing. We need to find out what it is so that the enemy can be
neutralized. Bend over.”
2 comments:
OH Geez, I only can think of one way for this to go. LOL
It can only end one way? Lol
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